For the first time in… well, ever… I haven’t bought my husband a wedding anniversary present. This isn’t a big deal to either of us – it’s just that I like buying presents. And getting them, derr, but if I had to choose, I’d choose giving them.

I’ve kind of fallen into a gift-giving rut, at least where my husband is concerned. Shamefully, my default gift shop has become JB Hifi. Thankfully I married a man who shares my love of gadgets, and for the past few years, most of the gifts that I’ve given him have involved a USB port. I’m the last word in romantic. Seriously, it was all I could do to stop myself getting him a dash-cam. An upgrade for the dash-cam I bought him 2 years ago. I TOLD YOU I WAS IN A RUT!

As it turns out, I didn’t get around to buying a present – wifi-enabled or otherwise this year, but the thing is, I hate the idea of our wedding anniversary going totally un-marked. I mean sure, I managed to enunciate the words “Happy Anniversary darling” before I’d EVEN HAD MY COFFEE this morning, so there’s that. (Although I’m pretty sure I sensed a “thank faaarck she said it first” thought bubble floating around above his head.)

So, in the absence of a store-bought (or, let’s be honest, internet-ordered) gift, I’ve decided to go down the tried and truly cheesy path of a public declaration of love. NOT sky-writing, because the weather in Brisbane is SHIT at the moment, but a cast-in-cyberspace list of reasons why I love him.

Before I begin, a message to my children… I know you think I’ve embarrassed you in the past. This WILL surpass it. Sorry not sorry.

This is by no means a comprehensive list, but here goes – in no particular order:

• He trusts me with everything. Wait, not everything. He doesn’t trust me with social media. Fair call.
• He understood when I went to Melbourne for the Real Housewives of Melbourne reunion.
• When there’s only enough milk left for one coffee, not only will he forego his own coffee, he’ll tell the kids they have to have toast for breakfast instead of cereal – rather than have me go without coffee. (This may or may not be for self-preservation reasons rather than actual love, but whatevs.)
• He tells me I’m a wonderful mother, even when my kid has plain pasta for dinner 3 nights in a row. And head lice (not for dinner).
• We get 2 newspapers delivered every morning. I only read one of them. When I sit down for breakfast he quietly hands over that paper without a word being said, despite only being halfway through it.
• He has put me back together when I’ve been broken more times than I can count.
• He never notices when I buy a new handbag/device/sunglasses. Or if he does, he never says anything.
• He tells me he loves my hair best when it’s long. And when it’s short. And when it’s that shit length in-between.
• When I said there’s was no way on God’s green earth I EVER wanted another baby, he said “no problem.”
• 5 years later, when I said “wait, I need to have another baby” he said “no problem”.
• He mows my little sister’s lawn.
• He listens to my Dad’s stories AS IF IT WAS THE FIRST TIME.
• He takes the kids to animated movies and the Ekka because I hate animated movies and the Ekka.
• He doesn’t mind when I wear my One Direction t-shirt to bed.*
• He cooks.
• He eats what I cook. Even when it’s crap. Which it mostly is, unless it’s spaghetti bolognese. I make awesome spaghetti bolognese.
• He doesn’t complain when we have spaghetti bolognese 3 nights in a row.
• He understood when I went to do the groceries and came home with a labrador.
• He has beautiful hands.
• He is crazy smart.
• He makes me unimaginably happy.

I love him.

*He probably minds.